This article is inspired by an essay with the same title on Cup of Jo by Abigail Rasminsky. Living in an apartment building in LA, the author - a writer and editor with a seven-year-old, formed a deep bond with her neighbor, a 70-year-old man who lives alone. It started with small gestures - exchanging bagels, bananas, cookies - then blossomed into a deeper relationship that mimics family. Things like that gave her extra warmth from a community she never thought of before - outside her circle of close friends and family.
That reminded me of my own experience here at New York City, with a community of security guards.
I started going back to the office pretty early, starting last October, and I was definitely one of the <15 people who came to work every day in a building that used to occupy a few thousand employees. The usually crowded lobby was now empty, and the security guards eventually knew me - the Asian girl with brown-rimmed glasses and a blue mask that walked in every day.
At first, we just nodded and smiled (under a mask) at each other. Then, one day when I left the building, a female security guard said to me, “Have a great weekend!” Surprised, I replied, “Thank you, you too!”
Soon, they started looking at the lunch I brought back with enormous curiosity.
“Sushi!” A man in the uniform said, “That looks so good!”
Or, looking at the oranges I brought back from Whole Foods, placed on top of a bowl of Sweetgreen as if the fruits are in a basket, “Did you just came back from an orchard?“
One day, a security guard decided to play soccer in the lobby with a ball of paper on a Friday night. “Soccer!” He shouted at me, as I walked past the security gate outside the elevator. I kicked the ball right back to him, and we shared a few laughs.
I am normally a very introvert person who do not really talk to strangers, and I still don’t know any of the security guards’ names. However, these interactions really provided a sense of warmth and community in my life that I didn’t expect I’d experience during a pandemic.
Becoming an adult, sometimes it can feel as if you are very much on your own. In the adult world, everything is a lot of work - you need to constantly work on your career, your social life, your health - or, it seems like, you will lose it all - without a good network of allies at your company, without close friends, without people that will lend a helping hand if you are sick.
Being organically involved in a community just because I am geographically close - because I bike from Midtown East to Midtown West to go to the office every day - really provided a safety net for my daily life.
It reminds me, when I am overwhelmed occasionally, that I’m being taken care of by the world.
Readers, what unexpected relationships have you formed during the pandemic?
